The Flying Sauce-Errrrrrrr

Its amazing how your own senses ditch you when you need them the most.
When i say need them most i mean in very very difficult situations for eg when u r trying to open a sauce sachet.

Ok so I am in Southamton with my English Collegues - yes everyone knows how " table mannered " the english are.We all go for lunch and i fill up my plate with macroni and vegetables.
I pick up some sauce sachets on my way. WHy? Why did i have to pick up the killer sachets ?? I taste my macroni while laughing at some joke my English collegues were telling me without really understaning what was so funny. The macroni tasted soooo very very bland.This is the wretched moment when i realized that i needed some sauce to spice up my boring macroni. So i opened my first sauce sachet, poured it on one side and yeah the macroni tasted slightly better.After a while i realized that i needed to open another sauce sachet and this is also precisely the same moment when my senses decided that i dint need them for the next 5 mins.


Listen up friends, Lesson Number 1: when u open a sauce sachet next time, i am warning u, ensure that ur senses are with u and apply ur full concentration only on opening the sachet.

I picked up my second sachet while listening to some boring remark my indian collegue was making on how spicy indian food can be. i was thinking of why he could not eat without talking so much. If only i had not worried too much about him and concentrated on what i was trying to do. Sigh!I dint realize that i was actually struggling to open the second sachet the reason being my fingers were slightly oily and before i could say Crisp Crunchy Cabbages, the sachet opened up and the sauce went flying straight ahead over and above my plate on to the white table cloth and even further onto the clean bule shirt of my english collegue sitting right opposite me.

Lesson number 2: Open up as many sauce sachets u think u wud need before u begin eating ur lunch to avoid trying to open the sachet with greasy fingers sometime later.

The worst part is yet to come. The poor engligh collegue did not even realize that a few zillion molecules of bright red ketchup had just about landed on his nice shirt cuz he was busy looking somewhere else . The tip of another guy's full arm shirt dipped itself mysteriously into the red pool on the table while I looked at everything happening around me with butterflies in my stomach. Nobody saw the flying sauce ......can u believe it ?

Ohhhh god....what do i do now? Do i tell the poor guys their fate ? Or do i let them discover the tragedy themselves ? What do i do ...oh please god tell me what to do??
And before i could make up my mind...." oooops how did this ketchup get here ? ".....said one of them....i froze....now what ?
They all looked around and i was the only one with ketchup sachets on my tray....and i also had some ketchup on my fingers and the most important piece of evidence was that i was still holding the sachet in my hand with the dumbest possible look on my face.....caught red-handed eh ?? yeah.

" hey look at the other guy, he is eating his food with his hand " i wanted to say to divert their attention....but....

" Oh Oh its alright, happens , lemme wash this off"...they left to the wash room.
I broke into the silliest possible grin.

Lesson Number 3: eat ur food without ketchup if u cannot follow the previous 2 lessons.